New York’s J-Spot
You can’t get much sexier than Soho born-and-raised Lobe, writer of the much-loved sex column for The New York Observer.
Each month Lobe reflects on relationships past and present and brings her unique perspective to the intimate, messy and often confounding experience of connecting with others in a city as vast and chaotic as New York. Her stories crackle with candid conversations and intimate interludes and always leave you wanting more.
Here she let’s us in on her favorite NYC hang-out spots and where she goes for writing inspiration.
Check out Lobe’s columns here.
How was growing up in the city?
I grew up in Soho in the eighties back when there were still big Mack trucks at loading docks. The buildings in Soho were mostly factories, artist studios and art galleries. It wasn’t always so glamorous but it was really special and artists made Soho what it is today. I learned to ride my bike at the Thompson Park, now called Vesuvio Playground. Battery Park City was also a big part of my childhood. We spent the summers in the Adirondacks so I’ve got a little bit of a country in me too.
How did you become a writer?
I was writing poetry when I first learned how to spell. I was very melodramatic and loved emotions. I would write about really sad things and then act my writing out in my bedroom and see if I could produce tears. In college I majored in creative writing and then while I was acting in Hollywood it helped me make sense of an often very nonsensical world. It was something that had a hold on me, my backbone.
Can you describe your writing style?
I like the juxtaposition between light and dark. For instance getting really down and dirty in one section and then in the next describing something really beautiful or angelic. And when you’re writing about sex, there are some great opportunities to explore the light/dark themes.
What two or three books have influenced you most and why?
I’m obsessed with Paul Auster’s Winter’s Journal. His writing speaks to my heart and the emotions conveyed are huge.
I love David Sedaris. He is just so funny, effortlessly. His mind is really twisted and he owns it! He really inspires me. If I’m feeling a little serious I’ll read his work.
I love the Poet Jorie Graham. I studied her in college. She finds these breath taking moments of the “in between”, the space just before something is about to come together or break apart.
What are three of your go-to places for artistic inspiration in NYC?
I love McNally Jackson Bookstore. It’s just so cozy, they have great hot chocolate, there are cute guys and books to keep me inspired. It’s kind of like heaven.
When it’s warm I love Battery Park City and walking along the Hudson. It clears my mind.
I relax and have my workouts at Golden Bridge Yoga. It’s Kundalni yoga, which is more meditative and it centers me.
Do you have any under-the-radar “Jasmine spots” in NY you’d be willing to share?
Miss Lilly’s is fantastic and so much fun. I like the Smile. It’s super cozy and adorable. Lucky Strike is my go-to place. The lentil/dahl soup at Hampton Chutney is so good I could and almost eat it every day. And any place with a park is lovely. Washington Square Park and Central Park if I manage to get uptown!
Describe your perfect day in the city?
It would be a summer day, and I would have gone to my morning yoga so I’d be feeling harmonious. I’d wear a long flowing dress and stroll through the West Village and peak into shops and buy a book or two. Then I would meet my lover and we’d walk along the Westside highway and make out on the grass. My lover would be super thoughtful and just happen to have a blanket so the grass wouldn’t itch us. And we’d get some sun and have strawberry ice cream and….New York City can be so romantic. That’s what I want, to have a tremendous love affair in New York City. Now that would be a perfect NY day.